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Greeting IDW's. I want to bring up a matter that occured that has really got me thinking. It invokves my conservative beliefs vs my family going against my beliefs due to ingnorance and incorrect information that they continue to believe in.

Some days ago, my mother and I got into an argument. She noticed a Trump 2020 survey in the mail to which she disapproves of. Although
I personally didn't request the survey she is under the false illusion that he is evil and a racist.

So here's what I did: I peacefully stood my ground with a stoic demeanor and gave her some information to which she is not familiar with. Such as the low black unemployment to which I offered to show her evidence but refused, the deceptions of the media, etc.

None of my persuasion techniques were effective due to her emotionalism. I was cordial the entire conversation.

There is however a source to this.

She is an immigrant who came to the US legally from Nicaragua in 1970 but chooses to not be a citizen (green card status) I was born to an American father here in California who was originally from the state of Georgia. My grandmother became a citizen before I was born but does not like trump either despite the fact that citizen immigrants don't get reprocussions for following the laws. She too believes in the false information. If memory serves, my mother's reasoning is due to not wanting to have to fill out tedious paperwork despite the fact she qualifies to be a citizen. Personally I think that is a poor excuse to not be a citizen. She mentioned that doesn't want anything to happen to her given the issues of migration (even though she is here legally but chooses not to be a citizen. Although this could be a scare tactic to get me to conform to the lies of the media and through identity. I can tell her fear seems legit but i know she is badly misinformed to the point where she is behind the times to a certain degree. Or all the above.)

She tried to get me to conform me into not using my head (identity politics rhetoric) and saying that trump is (this and that: you know what I mean). Saying i'm this and that.

Deep down I knew it was selfish and unfair of her to approach me to get me to conform without using my head rationally when i have my own reasons to support the president despite his shaky stance on the 2nd Amendment.

Once again, i stood my ground and rested firm on my values beliefs and principles taking in the heat.

Personally, I think she should become a citizen so she can respect America's laws and humble herself into thinking that personal responsibility to owning up to bad decisions of refusing to be a citizen is honorable compared to trying get me a rational minded college millennial to get my to submit to the deceptions of society. I have researched statistics, facts, and various valuable information for the last 3 years now and there is no way I would ever betray what I believe in despite the uneasy feeling of having to display my own courage towards my own mother.

I said some relevant things to her with all due respect.

In the end, I love her and I know she loves me.

The thing is i need advice.

What does someone like me do in this situation?

I intend to not submit into the ill's that the left has produced. Since i live in a household where my dad does not live with me anymore I know i have to be a man by my own merits.

I do however have a plan i may put in the works. I'd like to sit down and have a civilized discussion with my mother on politics but her emotionalism and cognitive dissonance are barriers to having any insight on the issues of the country. In addition to this, I may have to tell her that I ain't going to allow myself to conform to how others want me to think. I've studied good amounts of historical and philosophical literature and have no plans of rejecting my principles (bible included. I am a rookie in it currently) Lastly, I would to would like to offer her help on paying to be a citizen (I suspect money may be an issue so i'm guessing.) But not going to revoke what I believe in regarding migration.

Please post your comments. I'm not sure if this is the best place to address my story and issue. Any help would be greatly appreciated.

E-E-E 6 Sep 14
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4 comments

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0

Maybe move out? Stand up like a man and face the world, remember that you should not judge yourself according to others, but only against yourself. Ask yourself if you are a better person today compared to yesterday. As to your mother's opinions, they are as valid as your own and probably as accurate, take them or leave them dependent on whether they are beneficial or not.

1

I think the most important thing you can do is be calm and happy. It takes a lot for us to slice through our bias.

2

I have been dealing with something similar with one of my brothers, he hates Trump, and thinks he's pure evil. What I've learned is not to defend Trump directly, but rather question each criticism he has with Trump as it comes up. For instance,

"Trump is racist".

"Oh, OK, what did he do that was racist?"

"He called Mexicans murderous pigs"

"Oh, actually he called MS 13 murderous pigs, but he praised Mexicans as a whole. Do you want to see the transcript?"

It can be tedious, but everytime he makes an accusation, I have to ask for the root of the accusation, and either disprove it or agree with it if he is proven right. The reality is, he rarely proven right. In the end I have to admit that I do not agree with everything Trump says and does, but such is the case with every president ever. Where we stand right now is that I've asked him a few times to show me someone better, he has yet to come up with viable alternative. At this point, he doesn't necessarily disagree with a lot of what Trump's policy positions, but rather he doesn't think Trump is focusing on the right things. Again, welcome to every president ever. Oh, and he still thinks Trump is Evil, it's just a feeling he has. OK Bro, whatever.

It's a lot of work. And there are few people in this world worth the effort to me, but he is most definitely one of them.

I might as well adopt the "question every criticism" card and apply it to my conversations as well.

My mother believes she'll be deported even though I know full well that's not true. She's an older woman with physical ailments and cannot work. I believe that she needs to know that humility is the antidote to her flaws. My plan consists with the following:

1: Announce my declaration so she knows I am by no means a pushover and will not conform to anything that goes against my beliefs and acting in ways that are not by my character.

2: Telling her to embrace her status as a green card immigrant with humility instead of trying to get me to not vote for the President out of fear. Acknowledge your mistake of choosing not to be a citizen and be rather adult-like, mature, and be humble of your own shortcomings given that you live in America. In other words, taking personal responsibility of your choices.

For #2, making the humility arguement is the best argument I can think of to respond to the "I can be deported" comment she made.

If you have any alternative ideas I would greatly appreciate it. I know I may get backlash from this but I need her to know I intend to plant my feet to the ground hard like a stubborn plant-root weed.

Thanks for sharing.

4

First of all, thank you for sharing your story here. Second, you already answered your own question, as it looks like you have a plan in place. Now all you have to do is follow through with said plan, and keep being courteous and level-headed with your mother. Hope all goes well for you.

Seems fair enough. Unfortunately I live in an environment where despite me paying the bills, taking care of my mother, and living with 2 other people who don't like my beliefs it is a bit of a Lion's den time to time.

I just need some people to talk to and I don't have that luxury to speak my mind to someone mature enough to handle things of this nature where I live.

@E-E-E My situation is similar, I take care of my mother too and she doesn't particularly care for my right-leaning views. It can be difficult at times. Hope you find the community on this site to be helpful, IDW.Community sure helps/helped me get through the rough times.

@SpikeTalon I might start to do that a bit often here on IDW.

I care for my mother also and even at 86 and beginning stages of dementia she is a die hard Democrat...however being the peace keeper I nod and smile..IDW does give us a piece of sanity. Hang in there gentlemen we are blessed to still have our mothers so many don't.

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