If you're a young man that is struggling in life, I want to tell you something: It's okay & you're not alone. Let me tell you what happened to me.

I grew up without my father in life, making it difficult to find a path into manhood when I became an adult. I left HS & went to a trade school but couldn't find an IT job. For years, I worked at dead end jobs despite my education.

At the age of 21, I became a father. I had no idea what it meant to be one but I knew I didn't want to be like my father. I had more pressure to become something that I did not know how to become.

A year later, I moved from NJ to Nashville with promises of an opportunity that wasn't real & promise of place to stay that was a lie. Luckily, I had a job but I was homeless. My co-workers helped me by paying for my hotel rooms until I had enough for a deposit on an apartment.

After a year of living there, I moved back home to try again. Bounced through a job or two & got a great paying union job + benefits. Only problem: I hated it. I developed panic attacks and went on disability multiple times. I was home so much that I developed agoraphobia.

After 4 & 1/2 years of dealing with this situation, I got myself fired. Unfortunately this was when unemployment was sky high. I was denied unemployment and my appeal took over 6 months to be heard. I was living in my friends basement, without a job and getting fatter by the day.

I had no choice but to start over again. I went from making around $26 an hour to $13 an hour. My car got repossessed even though I had to travel almost an hour to work.
From there, I left & found another job making $17 an hour. Progress but it was another dead end job. After a year, I found a temp-perm job making $19 an hour. Week 2 I got the worst flu ever yet I still went to work everyday. End of my 2nd week...they fired me.
Now I'm living at home, unemployed, with a son to support and I thought I was making progress. I went 3 months without any income since I was ineligible for unemployment. I couldn't even qualify for the military (I actually tried...)

One day, I get a call from a recruiter that I previously spoke to but flaked on me. He had a job opportunity...an IT job. Finally, a real IT job. It took me over a decade to get the type of job I always wanted & needed.

From that moment on, that luck phone call from a recruiter, my life projected upwards economically. The older I got, the more I matured & the better a father I was to my son. A year ago, I challenged myself & wrote a book. I published it in March.

I say all of this to say that success isn't about becoming a millionaire. Success is about becoming someone that you can be proud of. Someone that your children can be proud of. Someone that is consistent, loving & healthy. It took me years to get to where I am today.

If you're a young man struggling, you're not alone because I was that young man. If you want something, you keep going, you keep trying. Struggling is a part of manhood. Embrace it.

If I could go back in time, I wouldn't change a single thing that happened to me. It made me who I am today. It makes me appreciative of everything I have. Everyday I am thankful & I don't take anything for granted. That's how life should be.

Humble yourself with your failures. Enjoy the rollercoaster of life. Become something that you never thought you could become. Your struggles are only a test & you will pass them. Believe in yourself & you can do it. Lastly, trust that God will always be there by your side.