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I just watched your new video and I’m really happy you’re able to address those kinds of things. One thing I wanted to touch on is that I don’t think women who have sex with women but aren’t “biromantic” are necessarily bisexual, either - for me and many others, sexuality includes romantic attraction.

Personally, I’m not a big fan of the split attraction model because I believe it operates on a misunderstanding of how sexuality itself works and what it can encompass - not all aspects of sexuality are explicitly or obviously sexual, but even romance ties back to sexual attraction. That being said, I think it’s easier for women to experiment sexually with other women (I think women in general are more “open” sexually), but I wouldn’t consider them bisexual because I don’t only consider the act of sex to be part of sexuality. I’m curious to hear others’ thoughts on this.

Another problem I have with it is that it often doesn’t take internalized homophobia into account. Obviously not everyone is going to have the same experiences, and having sex with someone and dating them are both very different, but I do think it runs deeper than the split attraction model illustrates.

Jayyy 4 Apr 26
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1

interesting take! I just think its important to note that some people romantic and sexual orientation is separate. internalized homophobia good point!

I agree that it's separate for some, and I'd love to talk more about what I personally think about the split model and what emotional attraction actually means - I have some essays to try to knock out, but I want to try to formulate my thoughts after that. I have some problems with information processing so it's sometimes hard to put things into words. ^^' I like talking here though because I'm able to think more deeply about my own views and why I think certain things.

2

I was just in the middle of writing a post about this - as a bisexual woman myself, I don't think you're actually a bisexual if you engage sexually with members of the same sex, but your feelings never extend emotionally or romantically towards members of the same sex. That's not a bisexual. Part of sexual orientation IS your capacity for an emotional or romantic connection, not just what you do between the sheets. I don't believe in the "split attraction" model for exactly that reason. Sexual orientation isn't just who you sleep with - it's who attracts you on an emotional, spiritual and a romantic level. Having same-sex relations without actually connecting emotionally or romantically to the same sex? That's not what bisexuality is.

can i post this idea to twitter later?

@ariellescarcella yes, of course!

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